Sunday, August 22, 2010

Fifty Guinea Pigs

I hit a milestone this weekend.   I have lost 50 pounds.

Just to put things in perspective, I googled "what weighs 50 lbs?"

I have lost the equivalent of:

* a large bag of dog kibble
* six gallons of water
* an average second grader
* one bale of hay
* an elephant's heart
* one medium sized dog
* six human heads
* four average sized two year olds
* four bald eagles
* two and a half automobile tires
* fifty guinea pigs

To celebrate, I went out and bought a little black dress.   We were shopping for the kids' back-to-school clothes, and my eye landed on a cute form fitting dress - the kind I wouldn't have given a second thought to before - and on a whim I grabbed it as we headed to the fitting rooms to try on the kids' clothes.

Standing in the family dressing room with Greta and Finn, I slid the dress over my head.   Greta's eyes got wide, and she said, "Wow, Mom.  Just - WOW."

Finn shook his head solemnly, and said "Nope.  No way.  Too sexy."

That sealed the deal.   I was so excited to fit into the dress I didn't have time to ponder where my 4 year old learned the word 'sexy'.

I'm almost at my goal weight.   Four and a half months ago, I began this journey, not really believing I could lose over 50 lbs, but determined to give it a try.   I'm amazed - truly - at my new shape.  I weigh what I weighed in my early 20s (although not everything is where it was twenty years ago - some things are, shall we say, lower). 

I have lost 50 lbs, but it is what I have gained that matters:

* the ability to shop for clothes because I like them, not just because they fit
* more energy
* no aching back muscles, and knees that don't creak in the morning
* I can run.  Run!
* lower blood pressure
* the ability to accessorize with belts
* getting dressed in the morning without a pit in my stomach
* no fear of mirrors
* wanting to appear in family pictures
* a better understanding of myself, my thoughts patterns, my habits 

The best part, I think, is that it doesn't feel like a diet anymore.   Life doesn't feel full of the things I can't have, it's just a matter of making lots of right choices throughout the day.   I still eat some of the Jenny Craig food - but for the most part I'm managing it on my own now.   I don't really have cravings; and when I do they pass quickly.  It's just not worth it.   It feels like this new way of eating has woven its way into the fabric of my consciousness, so it isn't about deprivation, it's just about living life.

I think back to April, when this all began.   How impossibly far away my goal weight seemed.   But it's only four and a half months, or 135 days.    And I take it one day at a time - sound familiar?    Just like with sobriety, I don't think about tomorrow (will I make it?  will I keep the weight off?)  or yesterday (I lost two pounds last week, how come I didn't lose any this week?)    I focus on the next right choice.   And if I slip?   It's gone, history, nothing I can do about it now.  On to the next choice, the next decision.  

Fifty is a lot of guinea pigs.   Good riddance, I say.  



27 comments:

  1. Awe-SOME. You look FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!

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  2. That is so exciting! You look absolutely smashing! Thanks for your email responses last week... you are a beautiful person-both inside and out. =) Thank you.

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  3. I agree with Finn. Too sexy. Well not too sexy. Congrats. That is amazing!

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  4. Your smile is contagious in this picture. One can really see how happy you are. Congrats!

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  5. This brought tears to my eyes...I'm soo happy for you and so want to be where you are. Some days I feel like food is my new wine and I hate that.
    Good for you!

    ps-I love my new necklace....

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  6. Wow. I really like this post--your words are so wise--but my favorite is your beaming smile and confidence in that photo. You look amazing. Bravo to you!! (BTW, we met briefly by the elevators at BlogHer--you and Heather thought I called her Dooce, but I'd said, "Goose!". Glad we met...wish we'd had more time!)

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  7. You look fabulous!! Congrats on hitting the 50 pound mark.

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  8. wow, that is just amazing. i currently have your average sized 2nd grader sitting next to me on the couch, and lemme just say you are one amazing (and sexy) woman! congratulations on hitting the 50 pound mark!!!

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  9. Gorgeous! I love that dress! My husband and I recently (about a month ago) started changing the way we eat, and the difference that it is making is huge to me. Not just in the pounds coming off, but in the self-esteem and confidence going up.

    Way to go!

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  10. Oooh-la-LA!!
    Ellie, you are beautiful.

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  11. You look great!
    I weighed in today, and I've lost 10.2 pounds in five weeks. I am so excited-- although I am holding off on any clothes shopping for a while longer...

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  12. You look just divine. Happy. Radiant.

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  13. You are SUCH an inspiration!!

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  14. Wow - 50lbs? I haven't been reading your site for your whole journey, but 50 pounds is incredible. The pictures of you before were lovely, too, btw, but I know the difference in energy level and confidence are like feeling 10 years younger, too. Congratulations!

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  15. Greta said it much better than I could. Wow... just wow.

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  16. You look greeeaaattt. Seriously.

    But for the record -- and maybe I'm a tad sensitive about this, but it dovetails with issues of body image -- no way is 50 lbs the equivalent of four two-year-olds, at least in this country (worldwide, okay: I'm with you). This would mean none of those two-year-olds would be in forward-facing car seats. Most I know are around 30 lbs, and why am I somewhat huffy? My two-year-old weighs approx. 45 pounds and is gorgeous and I REFUSE to restrict her calories, tell her she can't eat something (within the normal boundaries of reason and good sense), or make her feel "plump."

    I don't know if she'll have body issues along the way to adulthood, but the one way I can guarantee it is by doing any of the above. No thanks. (And I've been a lifelong skinny minnie, so it's not particularly my issue, though I assure you I have them.)

    Sorry about the rant -- the post was about you and how fantastic you look and feel, rightly so. It just kind of hit (ahem) a nerve.

    Anyway, go ahead with your bad self!

    -- KG

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  17. Sexy Mama! You look amazing but more importantly, you sound like you feel amazing. I'm really happy for you.

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  18. Fantastic. You are an inspiration. I am about 1/3 through my weight loss journey. 22 lbs. lost and about 40 to go. I can't wait to go back and read more.

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  19. You look fabulous!! Congrats on hitting the 50 pound mark.

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  20. That is so exciting! You look absolutely smashing! Thanks for your email responses last week... you are a beautiful person-both inside and out. =) Thank you.

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  21. You look greeeaaattt. Seriously.

    But for the record -- and maybe I'm a tad sensitive about this, but it dovetails with issues of body image -- no way is 50 lbs the equivalent of four two-year-olds, at least in this country (worldwide, okay: I'm with you). This would mean none of those two-year-olds would be in forward-facing car seats. Most I know are around 30 lbs, and why am I somewhat huffy? My two-year-old weighs approx. 45 pounds and is gorgeous and I REFUSE to restrict her calories, tell her she can't eat something (within the normal boundaries of reason and good sense), or make her feel "plump."

    I don't know if she'll have body issues along the way to adulthood, but the one way I can guarantee it is by doing any of the above. No thanks. (And I've been a lifelong skinny minnie, so it's not particularly my issue, though I assure you I have them.)

    Sorry about the rant -- the post was about you and how fantastic you look and feel, rightly so. It just kind of hit (ahem) a nerve.

    Anyway, go ahead with your bad self!

    -- KG

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  22. Gorgeous! I love that dress! My husband and I recently (about a month ago) started changing the way we eat, and the difference that it is making is huge to me. Not just in the pounds coming off, but in the self-esteem and confidence going up.

    Way to go!

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